Posts Tagged 'Sexual Harassment and Road Rage and the She-man!'

My boss is sexually harassing me. What can I do about it?

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Tell his wife. She’ll straighten him out. If your boss is a woman (these days it happens both ways!), do the same thing – tell her husband. She will have bigger problems than you.”

Better answer: Tell the head V.P. of the “Human Resources” dept., if the company is big enough to have one, and if not, see a lawyer about filing suit for sexual harassment.

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What do you have to do, to be guilty of domestic violence?

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Suppose you and your wife get in a heated argument and one of you slightly pushes the other, resulting in perhaps a return push or even a grab, even without the nasty slapping, hair-pulling or punching? The pushing or grabbing is still considered “Domestic Violence,” and when the 911 call is made in Florida, this means both of you will be going to jail.

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Dear Lawyer, I did some hurtful things to my ex-girlfriend and now she has a restraining order against me. I want to send her an “I’m sorry” email now that I realize what a jerk I’ve been. Can I do this?

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Dear self-declared Jerk, absolutely not! Sending a letter or a greeting card, even a nice one (or even flowers with an apology note) violates your restraining order and is illegal; or having a friend call and apologize for you (as you may erroneously think that it’s only you who cannot call her), is yet another violation of the “civil” restraining order, which disallows “any” contact, “direct or indirect.” When you’re arrested for the “new, separate crime” of “violation of restraining ...

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What do you do if you’re sexually molested?

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This question is too serious to allow for levity. Do not wash up or clean up, as you must help to preserve the evidence of the crime. Your body is essentially the crime scene. Tell the police immediately (even if you are related to, or friends with, the person who did this to you), and get to the hospital or Sexual Assault Treatment Center as soon as possible! There are “forensic” (legal-scientific) reasons that require your physical presence and evaluation ...

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What do you do if you’re punched or slapped by somebody?

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Smack ’em back! (NOT!)

Better answer: Call the police immediately, and then your parents, who may want to file a lawsuit against the dirt bag who punched you, depending on whether the idiot has any assets.

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What happens if I get into a fight in traffic?

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You get the hell beat out of you, unless you can fight real well. Seriously, this is a very bad idea, since people are getting shot and killed in these road rage incidents all the time these days. It’s a very dangerous world we’re living in today.

Better answer: If you are in a “road rage” situation and you so much as put your hand inside the other person’s car, it is a felony called “Burglary of a Conveyance.” Putting you ...

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